DISLIKES

Certain things particularly annoy or disgust me. I thought this would be a good place to get some of them off my chest.

1. People who like to get things off their chest. In this case I mean people who make deep phlegmy noises in their throat or lungs and then launch a gobbet of mucous out into the world. This is so gross - If you must do it please do it in private out of earshot. Even if you don't plan to spit it out, please don't make me listen to it gurgling up and down your throat.

2. Poor standards of hygiene, especially in restaurants. Returning to point one, there are few things worse than hearing kitchen staff in a restaurant coughing or sneezing behind the scenes. Another thing I have seen which I found disgusting was a pizza restaurant where one of the pizza 'chefs' was sitting on a table and as soon as my order went in, he leapt off and started rolling out the dough on the surface he had just been sitting on. I have no idea what other surfaces his trousers had been in contact since they were last laundered or how many times he had farted through them.

3. People who waste my time. This includes:-

People who get to the front of a supermarket check-out queue and then start rummaging in their handbag or pockets for their purse of wallet. What? - did you think you wouldn't have to pay? Are you a moron? Why weren't you ready with cash or card in hand?

People who get to the front of the queue at the ATM machine and are not ready with their ATM card in hand, or have to phone a friend to be reminded of the PIN number.

People who arrive at the taxi stand in a taxi and don't have their money ready. The whole process of people disembarking and reloading with passengers could move a lot quicker if it were not for idiots.

What this means is that if you can identify yourself as one of those above, you are inconsiderate of others and should be put down. You may not think that wasting two minutes of my life while I wait for you to get yourself sorted out is important. For me all of those minutes add up and I am sure that during my life, which is all too short, I will have lost weeks if not months to people like yourself who just don't care about others.

4. People who stop at the bottom or top of escalators to chat to their friends, giving those behind them no option but to pile into them.

5. People who try to get onto trains, before passengers who are leaving the train have exited.

6. People who congregate at the narrowest point in a passage to chat, or walk four of five abreast and therefore impede the progress of others.

7. Supermarket shelf fillers who think customers are a nuisance for wanting to get goods from the shelves they are filling.

8. Kitchens at restaurants or people's homes with dogs in them. We always had a dog at home and it used to have its food and water bowl in the kitchen. Now the sight of that, or of dog / cat hair or the animal itself in a kitchen makes we want to puke.

9. Waiters or waitresses who pretend not to see you when you beckon them, or are just generally dopey.

10. People who answer the phone 'Hello', especially if they are business. The answer should be something like "Hello, this is John, marketing manager at XXX superstores, how can I help you?".

11. People who do Burtons on pieces of cheese (please click the link on the left near the top of this page for more information on this).

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